Week 5: Weekly Roundup

Hey, you there.

Yeah, you.

How ya doin’?

Would you like a Weekly Roundup?

Yeah? Cool.

Apologies about last week, but I’m back and better than ever. Last week was a fluke in an otherwise perfect Weekly Roundup season. Is it a coincidence that the only week I’ve missed for Weekly Roundups was the week I lost? Maybe. Maybe not. Regardless, another DFFL week is in the books, so let’s take a look at what happened since I’ve been gone.



The Donatello 196.70 – Willenium Force 183.15



Insert any sort of down-goes-the-king joke here and it’ll play. The Force has been, well, a force to be reckoned with this season. And for the better part of three years, for that matter. But, in Week 5 The Donatello proved to be the better man.

Donnie came into this one with an attitude that he had it all the way. Gotta be honest, I didn’t see it, but damn he backed it up. Let’s be frank here, though. That Big-3 of Shontzie’s is lit. With TB12 back in the fold, and DJ and Amari getting back into their grooves, those three alone are gonna give him a chance each week.

Granted, TB12 ain’t playing against the Browns each week. However, he’s still gonna torch the damn league as a big fuck you to Rog. His line this week was stupid: 28 completions, 406 yards, 3 TD’s. GTFO, Tom.

Will had a pretty decent showing, but by his standards it was relatively sub-par. Mike caught him on the Saints’ bye week, meaning he didn’t have to face Will at full-strength with Brees and Ingram on byes. The Red Rocket did his best to keep Will in the game, and really almost put him back in contention with some garbage time slingin’.

We can do this every week, with every matchup. But, it has to really sting for Will to look at Tevin Coleman’s 27.30 points on the bench, and fucking hate himself. I know I would. Swap one of those RB’s he started and put Coleman in their place, and he’s got himself the W.

Oh well, sucks. And that’s FF.

Michael moves up to 4th with the W, and despite the loss, Will remains #1.

HeHateMe30 179.18 – Dead Rats Walking 173.36

We go from arguably the most meaningful matchup last week, to not only the closest matchup – but also the least important.

The bottom of the DFFL table is sort of a mess. I spent a good chunk of time down there last year, and it fucking sucks. When you’re down in the cellar, and you play against Rat, you’re really just jockeying for Draft position. Not that really anyone knows, or can keep track of who has Rat’s picks (spoiler: I do), but that’s really all that is at stake when facing DRW.

I digress, let’s look at the matchup.

Holy fuck, man. Rat does some dumb shit, but starting Derek Anderson has to be up towards the top this year. This ain’t fucking 2007, brah. DA tossing 2 interceptions was so damn perfect, considering Rat ended up losing by 6 points. I mean, you just can’t make this shit up.

Somehow, each week, Rat continues to amaze. What a damn time to be alive.

On the HateMe side of the ball, he really seems to have found something with Jordan Howard. Dude looks legit, and paired with Gurley, looks like a nice backfield. Luck had a Good Andrew Luck Game this week, and really helped cover up a couple pedestrian games – looking at you Graham Gano!

At the end of the day, to get in the door, you gotta step on doormats, and Patrick did just that this week.

Slob On My Cobb 189.93 – The Popcorn Playas 156.98

Y’all are probably tired of my same old song and dance about the other shoe falling, so I’ll save you some time this week.

I still hold true that my team is pretty butt and I’m sort of skating on thin ice. For now, I’ll take it. I may be 2nd in both the standings and points scored, but it won’t take long for that 2nd least points against to catch up to me.

The Playas are in a landslide right now, and are just looking for solid ground to hold onto. Stafford and Ryan are decent QB1’s that are strong weekly plays, whomever he chooses. But a lot of these dudes have been really up and down. There’s some talent here, not a ton, but some. It’s just a matter of getting them all to click at one time, and right now that ain’t happenin’.

It’ll be interesting to see how the season pans out for Curlis, as that 268 spot he hung Week 1 isn’t likely to be topped. And right now he’s in 7th, so that could be a fun piece of DFFL trivia if the 7th place finisher, posted the highest point total this year. We shall see.

Emmanuel In Space 207.04 – BRUMrodKOWSKI 166.48

When I write these, there’s really no rhyme or reason to how I stack the matchups in the review. And this is no different.

I looked at the score of this one, and thought, “Yeah, sounds about right,” and moved on with my life.

Fantasy football is funny in that one thing can change, and all of a sudden you’re back in the game, or vice versa. For Deppen, that change was in the form of Le’Veon Bell. Space was 1-2 on the season during Bell’s 183rd NFL suspension. Since Bell’s return to the field, Deppen has averaged 206.93 points over the last two games, best in the league over that span. That’s due in large part to Bell’s 52.20 points in 2 games.

This trend is likely to continue as no one really expected Deppen to not contend, despite his 0-2 start. It was a fun two weeks, though. On the other hand, I am not sure there’s a more meh team in the league than Ty’s. I look at that roster and just can’t help but feel the mediocrity overwhelming me. I’d put good money down this dude finishes an even .500, without batting an eye.

Here’s the most telling stat from this matchup, and it’s telling on both sides. Deppen could’ve started just Steelers and former Steelers, and only lost by 8 or so points. That speaks to the extreme level of douchebaggery of Grant, and how bad Ty’s team is.

waiver wire


I took a look at the Transactions page for last week, and I honestly clicked out of it so fast I am not really sure who was added. I was real close to getting sick, so I’m sorry.

Most of that was my own doing, adding everyone’s favorite future tax attorney Cameron Brate. I also added Eddie Royal for some reason, who has since departed the team. Fozzy Whitaker somehow was added, then subsequently immediately dropped for Buffalo. Idfk wtf I was doing last week.

Curlis didn’t actually start him, but I’ll give him the WWW award this week for adding Sammie Coates. He rung up 6 catches, 139 yards and 2 TD’s for 33.82 points this week, most by a waiver add this week. Despite the fact he was benched, Curlis added a solid young WR piece in a very potent offense.

pythag numbers


We’re finally starting to cook with some propane, fellas. The numbers are starting to pour in and we’re getting a better picture of things. The chart is below for your viewing pleasure:

Team PF PA ExpecWin% Wins ExpecWins WinDiff
Willenium Force 1013.46 925.58 0.619 4 3.096 0.904
Slob On My Cobb 951.62 848.70 0.649 4 3.244 0.756
Emmanuel in Space 912.58 905.62 0.510 3 2.551 0.449
The Donatello 851.04 770.47 0.630 3 3.151 -0.151
BRUMrodKOWSKI 886.17 895.14 0.487 2 2.433 -0.433
HeHateMe30 848.09 1006.53 0.285 2 1.426 0.574
The Popcorn Playa$ 908.67 937.34 0.458 1 2.292 -1.292
Dead Rats Walking 826.38 908.67 0.375 1 1.877 -0.877

A few notes:

  • Just looking at the chart, the first thing that jumps out to me is HeHateMe’s points against. My gawd, that is rough sleddin’. The numbers actually show he’s outperformed expectations, overcoming some massive obstacles.
  • Will is the first to the 1,000 points scored club this year, but the Pythag numbers still think he’s performing a bit above expectation. That’s due in large part to some teams putting up a decent amount of points against him, yet still getting wins.
  • Pythag shows us the team under-performing the most right now is Curlis. That’s a bit skewed due to his massive Week 1 point total, so that should level out in time.
  • Just look at some of those Expected Win % figures, some fascinating shit.



On to Week 6 in the DFFL. That’s sort of hard to believe that we’re already into Week 6, isn’t it?

This week might not offer us the juiciest matchups in terms of standings, but there’s still some juice to be drank.

#1 Willenium Force vs. #8 Dead Rats Walking

This one is my favorite matchup this week, and I’m sure I’m not alone in saying that. Will vs. Rat is always a treat. Sure, this one is 1 vs. 8, but that’s not the point. Much the same as we saw in Will vs. Brum, it’s just damn fun.

Now, Rat will get spanked and remain in his comfortable 8th place rat sewer, there’s no question on that. It’s just a matter of seeing how big the margin will be this time.

#2 Slob On My Cobb vs. #5 BRUMrodKOWSKI

So, I’m here in 2nd waiting for the train to hop of the tracks, and I’m guessing that starts this week. This is a classic FF trap game. I’m sure my team will get caught looking ahead the Deppen next week, and we’ll crap the bed against the KOWSKIs.

Brum is meddling around in 5th currently, and as I mentioned earlier, is super meh. That doesn’t mean his team isn’t capable of putting up a large number. He’s scored 160+ every week, and topped 185+ twice.  Those aren’t earth-shattering figures, but his floor is relatively low.

This one should be a sneaky-good matchup to watch.

#3 Emmanuel in Space vs. #6 HeHateMe30

Well, it didn’t take long for Deppen to erase his 0-2 start, and quickly is back up in the top-3. I figured it’d happen, just didn’t think he’d be back topside so quickly. It looks like it’s full-steam ahead for Space, and unfortunately I just don’t see Patrick being able to keep pace this week.

Pat is dead-set of his squad making the Playoffs, and it’s going to take winning matchups like this to get him there.

It’s birthday week for Scooter, and I’m thinking the celebration is going to continue thru the weekend with a victory in this one.

#4 The Donatello vs. #7 The Popcorn Playas

We’ve got another birthday boy this week, but I don’t see the outcome the same as Scootie’s.

Since the DFFL started, Curlis has been a middle-of-the-pack type squad. However, he’s in uncharted waters currently. Shontz has picked himself up by the bootstraps and worked his way into a Playoff spot currently. With a loss to The Don, The Playas may as well start taking a look at 2017.

Being 1-4 is rough, but you’re not dead yet (ha, who am I kidding). But getting to 1-5 is fold-worthy. Toss the cards back to the dealer, and start shuffling the deck for next year.

We’ll see if The Don can give The Playas the death blow this week.




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